Is Engagement Necessary or Not ?

Assalamualaikum!

Alhamdulillah my friend got engaged last weekend =)

It was simple & nice, and the best part was the chocolate cake! *drool*

Ok tak. It was meeting up with friends again! woohoo!

Actually, I have been meaning to share my thoughts about engagement.

But then, me being me, bila procrastinate, lama lama lupa. Hiks!

So! Without further ado, here's what i think about engagement!! - Just so you know, this is based only on my experience, it has nothing to do with my friend(s) and it is not exactly accurate. In the end, it's all up to you! =) -

1. Necessary if your families have never met, not friends on facebook/instagram/whatever social medias. From the engagement, at least both parents get to meet each other, and sedikit sebanyak know each other's backgrounds. This is important because soon-to-be-in-laws need to be able to get along with your parents and you, duh - and you'll have a peace of mind too! ;)

2. Necessary for your parents to officially and intimately know your partner.

3. Not so necessary if both parents know each other like best friends, and treat you & your partner as if you guys are married already (As in, dah macam anak sendiri laaa).

4. Necessary if on arranged marriage. (But depends on family punya terms. Some ok kalau kahwin terus)

5. Necessary if the girl likes rings. After engagement, dia ada 1 more ring to look forward to. Ok jokingggggg! Sometimes the girl needs reassurance and confirmation that the guy is serious about their relationship and wants to end up marrying each other, but need time to accept and adjust to the idea of getting married. Ha gituuu.

6. Necessary if the couple live so far apart. Example, girl studies in UK, guy works in KL. Tapi both from Malaysia la. Then girl balik KL, get engaged, and then balik UK habiskan studies sambil tunjuk bling bling kat kengkawan. "moy fiance is just soow sweet! he skoypes mey every noight!" Ececececehhhhh! =p

7. Not so necessary if the couple live so far apart. Example, girl studies in UK, guy works in KL. Tapi both from Malaysia la. if the guy kerja dah steady, then kahwin terus jeeeeeee =p Pastu honeymoon kat UK la. save cost! Ihikkk!

8. Necessary if you need time to save money.

9. Not so necessary if you need the money.

10. Necessary if your parents said so.

There.

I think 10 is good enough!

Hehheee =p

Truth be told, engagement is not all about the ceremony. It is a lot about getting to know your partner & his/her family better. When we become someone's "almost wife/husband", we probably (without realising it) will change. And that period la bila shaitan nirojim suka nak mengapi-apikan keadaan and make us doubt on the relationship.

Girls, your PMS would probably be worse than before. Guys, you probably feel pressured to reach your goals as soon as you can.

Things like this could happen. Coz it sorta happened to me! Kihkihkih!

So apa nak buat masa tu?

Istighfar banyak banyak, buat solat istikharah every night if you must - ask for His blessings in your relationship and His guidance, busy yourself with activities yang bermanfaat and ultimately, buy jubah from Zawara.

Ok kidding.

Ultimately, prepare yourself for your marriage and marriage life. Go get your docs ready, wali, tok kadi, learn the roles of a wife/husband - follow the Prophet's way if can, and chill.

Engagement takde pape sangat. Nak kahwin yang nerve-wrecking ball sikit. Hehe!

Ni la kawan ku yang baru engaged tu. Comel kan? :D

And yeah ni gegadis yang single but NOT AVAILABLE tahu? Hihi.

So they ask "When is my turn?". I was like . . . **speechless **shy shy ^.^

Anyway dress and shawl both from Zawara. Memang comfy dan tak jarang kain nya. Highly recommended! That mustard yellow handbag is from Charles & Keith. And the wedges too. Sorry, tak nampak sebab kain labuh angat :)

Ok so that's my take on engagement. Like I said, it depends on you jugak in the end. Nak buat boleh, tak buat boleh. Benda ni bukan wajib pun. Takde gempa bumi or ribut taufan la kalau tak buat. And takde la hujan batu kalau buat jugak.

Chill k?

Bawak berbincang with your family & your partner.

p/s: Pepandai la korang adjust sendiri nak buat engagement tu macam mana, kalau buat. Tak perlu so judgemental about others yang buat mewah, mahupun low profile. Like I said, it isn't about the ceremony sekarang ni. It's about the engagement itself. =)